Nine years.

It has been nine years.

How would I be if we had still been together for these nine years.

I could image and always image, it might go like....

I would stay with you in HK right now.

I would still be your little happy girl just as I was while we were in Sydney.

You always protected me as you thought I couldn't take care myself.

We probably had lots of different kind of memories fill with these nine years.

We probably got married or you would respect me just as you knew I didn't want to get married so early.

We probably faced any problems together, not like I now do it with myself and I have to be tough.

And, we probably spent the rest of our life being together, never fought, and stayed happy always. 

We would be so touched and impressed the ninth year that we had been through.

That might be what we supposed to do, probably.

So many things would be different from now.

Just because I was too young to have a stable relationship.

Just because I was too young to make a promise.

I'd just like to see the other different life I might have without you.

And I hurt you. I did something bad to you, but it was not cheating anyway.

I didn't mean to hurt you, I just want you to know, just because i was too young.

Now,

I regret. 

Every day, every time, every minute, I regret.

How could I go away from you.

How could I let you pick someone's hand up, and I thought that was good for you.

How could I give up this such a good man who has been treating me so well, even right now.

 But, what else I can do.

When the time I woke up, you said to me you were gonna marry. 

It's broken. My heart was broken.

I know, till now, I am still the one who is living in your deep heart.

I know, I am still the one who impress you so much, even now on.

I know, you are not going to forget me, you can't, and you won't.

I am still your little lively girl in your mind, and you already have a lovely wife that is not me.

I regret, and I miss you. 

I miss the time we were spending together.

You probably won't have any chance to see this,

but I still wish... you are good, all the time, without me. 

Your lovely,

Bec