↑copied from one of my intimate friends
(if you dont mind to read a story that beached in my head for ages, go on:
if you mind and dont wanna bother, skip this entire entry)
i was just learned with deep regret of that message
its not much one can say at a time such as this
i might understand that feelings (yet i still remember all that feelings and remember feeling low)
i was in a depression while my grandpa passed away
it's really hard to accecpt the fact that he is gone
he was a figure that much more than grandpa nor parents
i was not brought up by my parents but my grandpa
he took care of my since i was a baby (coz my mother was in depression after gave brith to me)
the only one photo of mine baby time in fact was exactly my grandpa and i (he was holding a baby bottle with one hand and the other hand holding me [proberly drinking milk, i guess from that milky white color])
he was the one who picked me up from school, taught me to write and help me to remember that 300 tang's peoms and here and there and nearly everything
my child memory was full of my grandpa (that's y i got that result, mates)
he looked after me until his very last day
till now i still cannot accept the fact that he is no longer here with me
what he left was a memory, sadness and sorrow that wounds in my heart for years and years, refused to go away but found a home in my head
both of us wanna cry
there are some people who are dead rotten with words in face of tears. I'm one of them.
i dun no wht u want or anything, while in my case the best one could do is
to shut up and be there in my own silent way
the way which you could just stand there with me for half an hour and not feel anything wrong
it's not exaclty the best method (since it won't solve problem)
but at least the storm would suside temporarily and will not feel too lonely
it's no need to talk with me, but i will be there, at yr side, and that's what i would want when i m in the dumps
someone there at my side, not cooing nor analysing
but just......................................
there
