the weather is so bad today
i spoke to him in the morning :)
he said what can i do is finish next year school and go live with him
i said i want to i really want to but is not that easy
but when i said i want you so bad , i want to be your girlfriend, maybe your wife,i want to be part of your life!
after that he didnt reply back
after fews minutes..i said are you still here??
another minutes after ...he's offline :(
what is that mean?..does he not care anymore
or maybe i think too much maybe he went to lunch with his dad as he said :s
sometimes i think i actually thinking too much worrying too much day-dreaming too much
cos it never will happen !!! maybe i should give up ?? but i love him...what if he is the only one
my Mr Right???...if i give up...maybe my life wont be that happy
or if i dont give up...will he wait for me??is it worth it??...He probaly think im stupid ...
if i move to germany with him....what if we spilt up fews months after?? i will be stuck in germany in he middle of noway
i dont have anyfriends over there apart from him...i dont have any family live there too
there are so many things to think.......or should i not think anything..just think about LOVE????
but is so hard not to think especially for me....i think alot everyday to be honest ...i think everything !!!
Why dont God just give me a easy life....?? why cant we just live near each other why we have to two world apart
or why God let me meet him,,, if i havent met him before ..maybe i wont be that upset now
but im so glad to know him though...although is wasnt very long....
Why cant we just happily together like normal couple when i find someone i actually love him so much
why my life have to be so difficult compare others...maybe their life are same too
i really should stop thinking too much
i think i should move on?? but i really love him i dont want to give up :(
is so hard to choice....i know he wont move to UK and shall i move to germany for him?
and give up everythin gin uk..so silly i have to say ..and im young !
OH MY GOD..i just want to be with him so bad ...I just love him....
where is the miracles??? i just want to live with him 
I LOVE HIM....(L)
the only wish i want for my 18th is I want to be with him forever...
what i mean is we live together in th same world same country and same house
i just hope it will come true :)
| 
weird feeling 
