This summer is a very very long summer.

I have my summer holiday from 13th May to 31st August.

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On 12th May, the last exam day of semester two, I had my hair cut.

My long long hair have been cut and I have short hair now.

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At the late of May, I worked in Yata for eight days.

On the first two day, I worked in cashier to help packing goods into plastic bag.

Then, I worked in BB department to sell BB products.

I knew many BB products after worked.

It was not east to carry a BB.

It needed lots of money!

On the last two days, I worked in handbag department.

Since the VIP day was passed, there was even no customer in Yata.

It was so boring to stand for six hours!

However, I knew some handbag's brand.

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In the middle of June, I went to Shanghai to have my WIE.

At the first week, I worked as a waitress which was totally unrelated to my academic studies.

We complained and requested to change the job.

Then, We had one week break and was waiting to new company.

In the following four weeks, I worked in M+R company.

It was a forwarding company.

The people in there were very nice and I learnt much in there.

The life in Shanghai was very simple.

Work, visit and rest.

In this six weeks, I thought I had grown much.

I learnt to be independent and alone.

I knew how to live with room mate and adpat each other's lifestyle.

 I was used to wash clothes and eat out.

I planed to spend my money.

This six weeks let me think about my future life which is about job and live without family.

It was a good training for me to prepare the above.

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When back to Hong Kong, I went to learn swimming.

Owing to physical status, I was absent for three lessons.

On the fourth lesson, there was thunder warning.

We could not go into the swimming pool, so we practised the swimming pose on the floor.

I really started learning swimming on the fifth lesson.

But, I was sick after this lesson.

On the sixth lesson, my coach said my performance was worse than the first lesson he saw me.

I was not pleased to hear this.

Though I was still sick, I strived much than before.

On the seventh lesson, I got the skill and could swim for 20m.

I was delighted that I had learnt swimming.

Finally, I passed the swimming test.

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Once I finished my swimming course, I got a job.

I worked for a small company in food expo.

The salary and the walfare of the job were bad.

We worked for twelve hours per day, but we only got a free meal.

We had my lunch on three, even four o'clock, and did not have our dinner.

It was a horrible thing!

I was so so hungry during working.

Also, We did not have lunch hour.

We needed to work if necessary while we were having lunch.

I was bored at home, so I still went to have this job.

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Today is my birthday!

And, I am 21 years old now!

The birthday party was not good, but never mind.

Looking forwards a beautiful future!

To my dearest sister,

I don't know whether you can read this post or not.

If you can, congratulations! It is a chance for you to get close to me.

You know, our family don't like, don't know or may be shy to express love and care face to face.

So, some might deem us lack of love and care.

But, I can tell you they are totally wrong.

I am sure that we love each other.

So, I choose this way to tell you something.

Um... First of all, I think I should say sorry to you.

You are not reserve for me, from past to now, and I promise you even in the future.

Sorry that I might give you this feel in the past.

To be honest, I don't know who I am and don't know who I will be.

I have been confused when I enter the secondary school.

It seemed that everyday is very busy and time flys that I cannot remember each day.

I don't know I alive for what.

I just follow what others expect.

Everything goes on me is not my choice as I don't know how to choose.

I think I am a puppet.

I give my control to others... ...

That might be a reason why I love Killua.

He is very brave that leaves his home and runs out of his family's control.

Usually, I hate myself very very much.

I am not who I am.

I think I am a devil who pretend to be an angel.

I don't know what happen to my friends and me.

My friends and I cannot last long, from P6 to S1, form S2 to S3 and so on.

I make new friends and stand away to old friends each time when the environment changes.

I don't know why, may be I don't know how to run a friendship and even a relationship.

I am such as a relationship loser.

I meet many friends, but no one know me deeply.

I don't know whether I aboundant them or they aboundant me or both.

I am always close to someone and then leave them, always.

Maybe it is my personaily defect.

I discover it but I don't know how to corret.

Also, I am elderly sister, I am always be the fastest runner.

I am busy to cope with the changing, so maybe I am indifference to you and the family sometimes.

You might think sometimes I care you much but sometimes I forget you.

Very sorry about that.

Parents always seem me as a role model to you and the younger sisters.

It causes me a big pressure.

Occasionally, I found I create a big shadow for you.

When I know that, I was sad.

I don't hope you follow me, the one I don't like.

I hope you can be youself, the one who you are and the one who you like.

So, I stand away you after I knowing.

I hope I will not affect you anymore.

So, please don't blame at me for that.

I know I will leave home one day and also you and the youngers.

Actually, I am afriad of separation.

But, I know it will come and maybe soon.

Because we are growing at a very fast speed.

I deem the day I leave home is the day I grow up and I hope it will be.

At that moment, I think I am too rely to you and the family and family give me lots of responsibility.

I hope I can be free one day and alive for myslef only.

Maybe you might think I am so selfish to do it.

But, keep it in mind that, I will be still a sister who care you, love you and also the family.

Until now, I don't know what I have written.

The English is so poor and it is very very chaos.

But, I still hope you can get my mind.

Be the one who you would like to be and we love you forever.

From,

Your dearest sister

There is a devil still in my heart.

I don't like something very much, but I alway pretend I like it.

I hate something very much, but I alway pretrnd I don't care.

I hope to be a bad guy very very very much, but I find I can't.

Why? Why I can't be a bad guy? Why I can't say no? Why I can't?

I just feel I am always be used.

I hate this feeling!

I am not stupid, please don't use my helpful.

If i can don't care anybody or anything, how happy I am?

If i can listen to my devil and be best to my own self, how happ I am?

Lily, you need to try to be best to yourself.

Try it!