i don't know if i should be happy or not

how come all the teachers are having so much expectations on me evenn though i am not the most brilliant in their classes?

today, in history, the first grading period ended and we got to know our score

my grade in that class is so good that i am doing so well on the previous tests

i got a very high score that is approaching the highest but the teacher told me that i have to work harder

he told me that he wanted me to get a 100% in his class evetually

didn't u know from the first day that i don't like history and i am just working harder and harder for my grade?

why do u still have such a high expectation on me?

in chinese, the teacher told us that she understood that eveyone in her class had a different chinese level and someone in her class is superior in chinese

therefore, she set a different expectation on that person and asked that person to work the hardest as one could

did u recognize me slacking off in that class?? why to work so hard if i am having over 100% in ur class already

today in cross country, i don't know if i should be happy about it or not

we are having one of the toughest workout today for the upcoming league meet

we were to run 5 miles today and he said that he's going to pull someone off when it's appropriate

after the third miles, everyone was exhausted and my friend was catching up with me even though she was always behind me in races

then, he told my friend and other people to go back and left me, the only inexperienced person, to run with the advanced people

i thought that he didn't see me and therefore didn't tell me to return

however, in front of all the others, he told me that, "u the little bug that always drags behind with ur friend. i know that u have the potential and can run a lot faster but u are just letting urself to stay behind"

do i really have the potential

well.. maybe i did because after he said that to me, i ran a lot faster and harder

however, i don't want to kill myself for reaching my potential

i am extremely tired after running the practice

in my life, academic is way more important than sports

even though i want to be the top runner too, but that i will be dead if i try too hard in cross country because i didn't have enough sleep and i am stressed out from SAT