SoSoSo sad

sad

sad

sad

This times, I've been dying to see for the second episode of Kuroshitsuji II...

黑執事II ar~

sad

I had been a but disappointed to see it because the PV says only about new characters

and it didn't mention about the old ones~ the butler (Sebastian Michealis) and the master (Ciel Phantomhive)

Most of us (fans) weren't willing to watch 黑執事II

But I still make my way to it

And

The result is

Ciel and Sebastian are STILL THERE!!!!

SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSO...

I can't discribe~/ v \

But at the other hand

Kuroshitsuji (both I and II) is playing weekly

This didn't matter to me before

as I can't actually have a set time for using computer

or even watching TV

I don't have the MBS channel of Japan at home

the one that plays Kuroshitsuji first and best

well

even if I have

I can't watch

My family won't agree with this kind of animation

although it's not bad, just IIA I think

because of some bloody scenes

and it plays at midnight time

What a poor

I can do nothing with that

now

I'm just counting

seconds

minutes

hours

days

weeks

and waiting for the next episode

^v^

well

let's change the subject~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I know that actually not a big number of people would come to this little blog~

Whatever

I'm still writing what I'm willing to write

I'm still expressing what I'm willing to express

/ v \

But really

Thank you

for the little numbers

Thank you

that you have been here

or here now

that you somehow know something about me

I don't know what would you think about me

when you see this

I might like that kind of good, kind, little girl

yes I might

when I want to

I would be

but what I can say

is that

I don't have a good family

I didn't have a good childhood

and

I don't have a good mind, either

my mind can't work well in memerizing

in controling

in EQ

in IQ

in everything

I'm the type of people who observes well

and remember well

in what I'm interested in

of course

not in areas of "educational books"

something that don't matter to my life after all

-_-^

well

from the Twilight saga, (books)

this kind of people -observes and remember well-

are observents.

=v= (the Twilight saga is good, no, extremely brillant)

just since I was small

I observe

that's great, somehow

but for a I-don't-know-why reason

I love new things

and I've developed a style in doing anything

I can't discribe well

I somehow would do my very best

behind everyone

I want to be like what my family are

but I can't

I can't be cruel to my friends

to the ones who I know and I like

I can't be like my family, to be such a pride

they always think

if they give out something

there must be something to return

and they are so proud of whatever thing they did

even there's still a big gap between that thing and

what people expect

They can't see the area to improve

but I always can

when I'm free from the insane stuff

I think of what I've been in and what I may be in

and I think of how to prefect them

In the very original Chinese KungFu

people want to find ways to protect themselves from enemies

but also not to hurt their enemies

This is really similar to what I think

'though this is impossible, in my knowledge

It may be kind of 老成 to say this in my age

-I'm just a 14 school girl, but talking this kind of 人生教誨?!

that might be really freaking

would this be the 9th world wonders?

=_= crazy

But this is still what I think

Most of the people,

adult mostly,

put their colour-blinded eyes on money and theirselves

Although they try to cover that side of themselves by pretending

This is how I've learnt, to act

Just from I am a kid

I obsevred that how and why they pretend

Then I copied

and m life started to be "better"

less people shout at me

less people beat me

less that I am in a shameful experience

then

I have to admit that acting is not really bad

not really bad to the others, if I use it well, in a good way

but not in those ways they cover their own bad points

I can do nothing about that

My childhood,

it was really dramatic.

my family had been really rich,

having over billion of properties;

my family had also been really poor,

having no place to live.

My parents don't gamble, don't smoke,

they are somehow well-educated,

even you may say, kind-hearted

so kind-hearted that

they even take their own money to give out salary

when there was once one of the employee stole all the money

the amount wasn't just 10 thousand.

They give up everything to pay, even they aren't the employers

I have been having cheap food

having those rotten apples

those are really cheap in surpermarkets

and then

they didn't learn a lesson

long time till we're rich again

my father lend 160 thousand dollars to one of the relative

now

that guy died

leaving his properties to his children

and not returning any to us

we've been poor in that period

but nobody helped, even all of them knew

this is how the world is properly like

people sticking on the rich and power

as long as the rich and power is still rich and powerful

even they are brothers and sisters

if the ruch and power fell

nobody help

only the real friends

but the real friends, don't have money

and they can't help in physical directly

and

we were hopeless

well

this is how our family finance is in my childhood

maybe I'll type for more later

cuz I'm getting tired

OHoh

btw (by the way)

I'm studying to play guitar now~

but it's really hard to "press" the right tone out

and I'll need to put in more effort

^v^

I'm so so so sick today...ToT So So So sick... (Why do I feel like I'm "so sick"?? -_-^)

I've found that I'm occationally thinking about my form 1 school life...

That was my happiest but also the quickest academic year... ToT

I miss my friends... My friends, my good friends, those didn't change ones.

Time flies (this is from chicken's speech some days ago. -_-^ I don't actually lie this from its mouth =_=)

The time runs as the world changes.

It went too fast. Too fast that I don't feel like I can catch up. I can't catch up with its changes.

I used to be doing my homework myself, not copying (even when I'm not sure about the answer -_-^).

I used to be putting up hands when teachers ask questions.

I used to be asking teachers when I don't understand.

I used to be going home early.

I used to tell every bad things to my friends.

I used to show my disatisfied.

I used to laugh a lot.

I used to be blaming myself and the others.

But when I came to form 1,

everything changed.

I started asking others about things that I don't understand, not the teachers.

I started shutting up my mouth when complaintments wanted to come out.

I started smiling even when I wasn't wanting to.

I started pretending.

I started shouting or yelling when I feel ill.

I started being quiet and using a point of observing to look at the class.

I started to observe.

And I found things that I wasn't used to believe in.

I started to keep slient about things that weren't fair.

Because there are too much, too many things, that aren't fair. And wouldn't and can't be fair.

My orginal personality kept me believing and trusting.

I found friends. Friends that look brave and strong outside, but weak inside.

Like me.

The problem wasn't so serious in form 1.

I had friends like San, like K, like Mk... (all are not real names ^-^ coz I don't want to be hitten...^_^)

We have all changed.

I have changed to be a more observing person, more extreme, more to hide my feelings,"personality no.4".

San have changed to be more seemed to not be care the others, to be bad(quite bad -_-^).

K have changed to be having a stronger shell, and a prouder heart (she doesn't seem to realize -_-^)

Mk... -_-^ became a pride for her look. (I look like an ant in front of her....)

Fine...

I got no time to write now... /_\ (I'll explain -_-^ to myself...)

Whatever, I don't know what am I doing. Whatever thing I was - am - doing, whatever thing I was - am -  thinking; my brain is crazy already, you know? It turns out every thing I touch, I think, I see into that person who filled my heart. Crap. What am I thinking?? I'm crazy already. Don't ask me if I have time to play or go out or whatever - I rather sit on my bed, reading or listening piano. Yes, I am crazy already. I got all my time spent on thinking in the way my brain does, everytime, sitting, thinking, doing nothing, hear nothing, say nothing. I let my brain think in its own way, and take me to whatever place and do whatever thing. All the Luna New Year - due to the absent of my Dad - was just sitting on the couch and watch TV when I see Nothing at all; or half-lying on my bed, reading or day-dreaming. What the heck am I thinking?!! Whatever. All I can be sure to say is : I've gone crazy.

omg!!!!!!!!!!!!~I got so much hw!~~~~ I got the Mathematics hw, for {8} PAGES!!!!! and there are so many Chapters and questions!~~ What can I do??? /_\ I have only done the first 2 pages... /_\... and I had already used four pages of exercise bk! I can't imagine how many pages I would use for the Mathematics Christmas Holiday Exercise~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So HAPPY to see that I have just drawn the poster!! We need to do the project of Life Edu. today~Well actually I've done the drawing, Natalie will do the colouring at home, Crystal made blacken words on the top of the poster, Janet gave out great ideas, and, M. Leung done nothing... ~_~ That's so simple for a project!~

So happy that we are having a vacation! But So Sad that we weren't going anywhere this Christmas~

Whatever~ Wish you all a  MERRY CHRISTMAS & HAPPY NEW YEAR!~~~(type again tmr~)