I'm happy and i'm going to someone i love !!! hehe i want times to go pass fatser except the time i spent with you that can go as slow as it wants lolx !! haha well i ttyl i'm really cold and i want to sleep love ya MTRJ  

miek supriseingly mom likes u and everything thank god for everything and i guess life isn't so bad after all and u will always be in my heart and mom i just love u and i'm thankful u accept my friends and mike... well love ya all

kenneth call me if u ahve a chance ok 

happy st. patty day i know i haven't write this a while and oh well.. mom is turnign the bitch side and i'm really stress out and i'm going to fight till the end becuz i believe love is undeafeable..we're just so strong and the more they're repressing me the more i will be rebellious and the more i will want to go against them and if they won't let me see u mike i will fight so hard... i'm a hard core.. me if u be a bitch to me i be a bitch to u and if u treat me with respect i treat u with more and even mroe respect so if u love me i love u more and if u hate me i hate u more..so that's life and if u dont' hate me nor love me u get nor hate or love so ur pick friends or enemy!..well i love u mike and taro adn phillip so important to me especially phillip and mike...<3 WAn6EVR

idk today feels so weird.. i was really happy today tho becuz spencer and john were being tards... misisng someone so much but he is not online right now and i just wish i can be with him tomorrow and i can't see him tomorrow i'm so sad =( wahahahah i wanna see u so bad i would willing to give up anything just to see u even my life even me getting kick back to h.k. i just want to be with u and everything..i got my class ring but is so big that i have to put in my middle finger becuz i want it to go at ring finger but so big.. =( -sig- then i had to gave my aunt a hug ewww.. i wanna talk to kenneth but why is he avoiding me and i'm really not happy can't talk to mike and i can't talk to spencer or kenneth..-sigh- not kewl..well i ttyl  love ya

happy 4th month mike we're amazing i seriously have no idea how did we get to be stuck with each other so long to be honest.. it was just amazing...and we didn't evn have school today which makes it even more awesomer..and i just love it and yay we're 1/3 of the years and i really think we can stuck with each other until forever i feels betray becuz of jen and erin i tho they were on my side and now they ahve switch and they have changed from whom they really are.. people change everything change time change...mike ur fricking amazing lolx i love mom and phillip

President Day so boring !!! Blah boring just wish to be with u forever and ever!!! -sigh- mike u and john -sigh no eyes see!!! well i ttyl so tired

Goon Hei Fai Choi... haha chinese new years...feels like nothing to me so confuse i don't even know...dinner was alrite..why do we like to say WHATEVER toward one and other and idk... omg..so confuse...idon't know this teaches u a lesson...that if u are single be glad abt it.. they say girls are moddy but sometimes i think guys are more moody than girls don't get how that work??? and of course the guys can't blame on their "friend" becuz they dont have that!! so what can they blame on... like nothing... -sigh- so weird and so queer...but i still love u michael

OMg.. today is the last day of chinese new years... but it was awesome...anne and i went down to jen's and then we had our chinese dinner and then we had a snow ball fight..Omg yesterday i'm so proud of myself when a39a was yelling me and i was just laughing at her face...it pissed her even more mad than she already was
 hehe ^^ i'm so funny!!! i'm really mean tho !! because i was like watching a movie in my mind with mike in my head... lolx anyway.. we went down to jen's house and then walked down to jen's friend's working place went to price chopper after and wants to see mike... holy shits he was so suprise when he saw me haha he was so suprise and his smile was so big that he couldn't stop laughing about it so big that he is so happy to see me like i was an angel that brings mircale toward the world when there's seem no hopes OMG... he was happy i know he was becuz my heart was happy too...but i guess we are happy as much as we can sees each other!!! anyway... then we went back to jen's house and then we went upstairs and talked tho a39a and great-aunt was going to freaked out but they didn't freak out much.. then when we had to leave mellisa told me what a39a and my greataunt was talking abt me and how i'm playing a trick on them Oh Well.. i know no matter how hard i try to explain no one will believe me no more becuz they're thinking abt me as a LIAR that tells no truth GREAT that makes life even better... OH Well that's life !! Life is never fair anyway..thenn we came home and then we went back home and then i do stuff and get ready for nothing and anne had a soccer game and then i was friends with laura and casey and then like we're friends and they asked me about the proms and everything wishing it would be fun if i go  but with who and who knows?? We're amazing...and we can do that !! wow we're so strong we got the power...yay...love everything u do...ur my fool!! AMAZIng life i like my life...this is awesome!! Kenneth how's China?? wish u can write to me?? more tell me....how's ur life..??

    u can crush me all u want....i don't care no more.. to u i'm just a piece of crap and nothing worth it  but hey u can hate me for ur life but all i have are friends to back me up till the end... i know ur worrtiness but i 'm a big girl now and u should trust my judgement...i'm scare.. i'm confuse who can save me i need someone to be there for me 

Omg here's one more day that sucks...!! idky i think i'm having mental breakdown i'm so confuse i odn't even know anymore all that we talked on the phone is my aunt and all the problem with her i hate it i hate it i fucking hate this shits this is annoying i hate it i hate life and i hate u !!  i hate everyone around me i hate shits it seems like we're not so close as before anymore...WTF is wrong with me i just wish i never born i suck at life i can never achieve no shits and i hate it..people treat me like crap like they can't trust me when i told them once i won't ever do it again...why can't she just trust me for once?? i told her i wont' and i wont' and she still treat me like a little kid to repeating shits OMG...!!! there's no way i can release my stress...i'm so confuse i understand how kathy felt when she is so stress out.. i can't cry becuz i dont' understand what the fuck i was crying for?? i hate u  i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u i hate u please kill me now please kill me i don't want to be alive no more...i need some drugs call me up if ur a drug dealer!!

wish that i can be with u forever and ever...just talk to u even for a sec just let me kiss u one last time and i wouldn't mind dying teh next sec.. but that kiss will last forever so hehe i'm a greedy lil biotch but this is all becuz i love u so much

over-reaction !! i admit i over-react when mike was playing video games it was nothing biggie and i freaked out for nothing that  means nothing...wow i'm a biotch aren't i?? freaking out for nothing and i  might need to go to mental hospital i know tere's something wronf with me  but WTF ?? i can't figure it out i don't get it i dont' get life?? Maybe is better that i never born in the world!!!

yay web is workign dont' hate me no more.. horray party at my house and ur invite to it !! 

    web is not workign so mad...damn it 

frickign website is mad at me...i don't like this website is mad at me and is nto workign ERR but anyway.. life is a fairytale when i'm with u mike..:D 

i'm confuse and mike prolly say "o this is not ur first time!!" that's not nice u should get spank in the butt...*spanking butt* haha ^^ are u scare now michael?? u should go run and hide in ur closet with spiders....climbing all over u...haha i can see ur freaky face right now... muhahaha i'm so evil.. but yes summer ur confusing me... u not only confusing me but also ur heart ur not letting true love to get into ur heart Summer girl.. i'll be always be here but u have to talk to me ok...i will be here for u as much as u need me and i will always be around u know my number so give me a call... Mike i'm just thank god that we don't have trouble like that... u know mike...i'm just thankful we're so trustable toward each other and we really mean everything toward each other... we're never be anyone else replacement becuz no one can ever replace u mike... and i know it for a fact no matter how hard i would never replace u with anyone but maybe except my book JK JK i definitly loves u more than anything becuz ur part of me and my family glad i find u...anyway... did u tho i would give u the asnwer of waiting for two days...at halloween.. becuz i know if i'm in the movie of hocus pocus i would be the blond witch becuz i'm always hyper and everything but hey mike u heart me and now u can't run away from me becuz i had a love magical spell on u forever and ever hehe hope ur happy with teh blonde witch that is hyper... well just want to tell u i heart u etenity michael  and now what figure some new pharse

i heart u etenity michael

is mike and me in the railroad...yay is so cute i love it 

WOW mike and i are so close we can sense each other crying mike no worries...i will always be with u ur not a lone and u will never be ever again !! i promise...the day that i'm still alive i would never leave u behind i promise...we're stuck together like the bond of H2O so if anyone wants to separtae us...it would be hard which means separating water and ppl can dead form that!! so try but it would be hard...but nothing i say will separate us lolx we're fricking AMAZING!!! =) WAN6EVR Michael Thomas Raphael Jakala

HOLY CRAP u won't believe this !! mike and i are actually stuck with each other for like 3 months which is 1/4 of the year !! muhahah now u r stuck with me haha and we're lasting longer than i tho we would becuz of a39a being a bitch pissing me off...gur!! but i guess our love is strong and undying and i believ love can take over anything we're strong and mike i'm sry abt ur family and i'm part of u family i will always be around when u need me u know my phone number so if u need someone to talk to give me a call not everyday to pissed a39a and j11j off...but of course...!! summer i don't know what to say abt u and ur ex adn ur present bf but i will be here is long as u need me i hope i'm doing a good job of a friend adn a gf especially mike i'm not with u physically but mentally we're together forever holding hands remember that's what u told me when my hope was down!! now when ur down and i will be the wya to keep it up!! NO MATTER WHAT I WILL BE HERE FOR U I HEART U Michael THOMAS RAPHAEL JAKALA AND SUMMER MARIE PARISE

don't feel good... 

luckily i ahve friends around

being my mom and dad

forcing me to the nurse

so lucky

to have u care MTRJ

then it was a mistake abt my best friend liking me

it was my illusion that's all!!

lucky he doesn't

perhaps he cares me like a sister

i would feel really bad if he really likes me

becuz in my heart i only have this guy named

michael thomas raphael jakala

so it would sucks and ruined my best friend and my relationship

but glad it was just a feeling u know

mike hope u don't think me cheating behind u

becuz i ain't

and i know i only have u in my heart

ur the only one

so much to say miss u much

but i g2g thanks for care

i love all my friends: elisa, spencer, kathy, Summer, Sarah, J.R., nicole, and whoever else

but of course Michael thomas raphael jakala

Gee i wonder why???

~tsz wai jakala is long as mike is chan

<3 SC and KG <3

<3 JJ and MC <3

<3 KF and BF <3 

what if i said yes to u on mike on the 31st instead of teh second it would be like every other months haha !! this is awesome how much we can communicate with each other by minds.....pat O u such a jerk i hate u and if u ever make me cry i promise u will never see ur future child ever again...i swear to god and u better watch ur "little friend"

spencer and kathy uare awesome... thanks for being there

summer gave me a kiss on the cheek  mike don't be jealous 

i heart u mike a lot.. wish u were with me eternity

aw oi lat mo han lear ga yut

michael thomas raphael jakala 

mike... jen chan is still hyper dky!! shes crazy what can u say!! i don't like u calling me 5'3 haha really funny ur face is funny...not kewl u jerk face...ARGH!!! well i still love u so i ttyl I NEED TO READ MY BOOK- FOR ONE MORE DAY by MITCH ALBOM...i love u mike more than anything in this world... <3 <3 can't wait till valentine's suprise!!! is it gonna be me suprise u like the 26th or u will suprise me MIKE...huh!!! 

jen chan is hyper becuz mike is online with her forever and ever mike u rock i would never wanna make u disappear in a magic box !! haha ^^ i love u mike ur such a cutie i mean *coughing* mor elike a babe.. lolx  

        hell

no one know what is hell

i know what is hell

becuz i been there

have u ??

hell is a place that my spirit being torture...

just want to dead

which way is teh quicker ways

please tell me

so i can dead

electri-killed

drowning

drugs

or a bullet shot throught my head

which one is painless

no one knows

i should try it all

don't want to talk to nobody

becuz i'm nobody

a person that is nobody

a person that is a piece of shits

family, friends, and mike

seems not inportant

just want to dead

and bury in ground forever

who can help me to dead??

kill me  

memory is the only the memory

past is what i done with all

present is now

future is when me in hell

alone 

no one can save me

feels so dead

maybe if i actually dead

iwill get some attention

if luckily

if not i guess i ain't worth it

who cares abt earth!!

life sucks!!

but i believe a miracle will happen 

that's when me dead forever and ever

maybe someday what i write

will make me a a famous writer

who really understand me

no one becuz i'm a lonely soul???

KILL ME

R.I.P. T.W.C. or J.J.  

i saw u in my dream since the last time i saw u it was like 7 month.. since jun 21st and in the dream i told u i like u as a friend and we have to be friends again and it was so weird.. just hope to get a letter from u... and i wrote u another letter since the sumemr was over i knew that u only liked me as ur friend nothing farther.. but i guess becuz of u i found my true prince to be with me  and he is michael jakala i'm so glad we were friends tho and i learned so much from u...thanks ray!!

then in my second dream i saw mike and we went h.k. shopping it was wicked cool wish it can comes true...haha

mike i missed u everyday since the 13 but this week was even more horriable becuz life juts sucks but with u in it it makes it better dky we been agruing so much lately is not that we don't trust each other it just we agrue for something like nothing i don't know we're being really weird don't get life but life is meant to be for a reason...just like the book the five people u meet in heaven

haha i love books more than i love mike JK JK please don't kill me

spencer has a secret lover

3 love triangle can't figure out what to too of course is not me but my best friend... don't kow what is guy thinking about can't always do what they promise.. kinda feels bad and stupid.. want to talk to u but ur too busy for ur games.. or any other thing.. bet u that i missed u more than u missed u...!! so much too say don't want to wait no more..i'm waiting for a abortive mystery i know i won't get any e-mails to be returns since ur bust with everything and i ain't expecting much anymore... don't suprise me much when i don't get any e-mails form u!! becuz i know ur too busy for ur tv games...and instead of typing..but seriously..e-mail is our way of communication how cna u do this to me ??  ur e-mail is the only thing that keeps me alive and u said u will try to talk to me but u ain't on so i guess is ur lost.. not mine...just wanna cry so hard...i know the phone is being cut down but...u don't have to take away teh e-mail from me too...i can't read mind anymore.. guys are confusing don't know what they're thinking and just so tired of it.. computer sicks and life sicks don't want to be online waiting the time go by and ur not around i can feel the chill by myself... g2g and put my self in the freezer and dead i guess... i need to leave myself in the cold until maybe a hot chocolate appears....<3 <3 I loev u MTRJ i won't be online until thursday night 945ish love ya mo han lear ga yut

life is like a dream but is dream a life or life is a dream?? who knows who cares is long as i'm with u MTRJ love ya a ton

    i just wanna died feels like a piece of shits and feels like nothing but if u really care abt me u should chat with me at least i know and i think it migth helped me out thnaks summer thanks for everything and ur sucha  great friend..mike...i want to chat with u but i'm too afraid too and this is a complicated story i don't know if i can or able to explain it to u but i will when ifigure everything out..i hope u will be on line when i'm on tonight around 7 and i just dont' know cna't think brain block so dumb and just wish my self can killed myself...dead adn dead is all that i can think of death is all i want but to be with u are my hopes...idon't even know anymore..life sucks i hate everyone including myself except for mike....who knows who cares my life my way...don't fele like communicate just shut myself down in a closet and hide in there for days and nigths who cares...  

idky what the f**k is wrong with me?? i know is something i need some times to think and if u really cares about me just leave me there please...i don't want to talk to nobody.. kathy, spencer and mike i know u guys really care but myself is gone crazy i needs times to figure out what the f**k is wrong with me...no one knows except for myself...thank you for caring everyone but i just don't feel like to talk to anyone or anything at all.. i have to get my mind straight up instead of being lost and i can't tell u guys what is bothering me becuz i know that will just make the problem worst and i think i'm being a whore but i really can't help thinking like that all i know is that i want to fly at least or perhaps to teh heaven... no one knows wtf is wrong with me... if u really care i shouldn't be getting a phone call...i need time to figure this all out by myself...no one can help except for my soul...i just needs time.. sry spencer and kathy if i acted really odd at school...i'm not trying to kill myself..but i just needs times to figure some shits out that's all!! thanks for caring...o shit i'm so screwed for teh phone bill becuz anne said it actually have outcoming and incoming calls shows...damn bitch damn o shit for sure now i failed my history course.... i just got my grade for my essay...i got a 70 on it...o shit i'm so screwed... i just wanna cried.. adn no body cares...life sucks i hate my self being so stupid...i hate myself even be alive...i hate myself for being such a whore...i hate it i hate it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please don't call me i need times to figure shits out by myself...  

to this guy named

michael thomas raphael jakala 

missing is a feeling

between someone that has close connection

missing is one of the reason leads to love

love is when you can't get someone off ur mind

even thought trys really hard

i guess life is torture

becuz it can never be teh way u wanted

but is long as we fight

who cares teh ending is long as we try

love = books JK JK

love is a thing that is irresistable...

whoever can irresist

it must be a DEVIl 

becuz love is something

that melted someone

and is a good feeling

when ur thinking about it

dream of someone

it represent how much u missed them

and how much u want to be with them 

love is tough and missing someone is tougher

becuz is a feeling in the mind...

i just want to tell u how much u been in my mind 

every single day every single minutes every single seconds

there's not enough of words to express my love to u

becuz if i even try the whole earth will be out of trees

well love ya and hope u can feel the love

~jennifer chan (even we know want it to be jakala)

happy birthdya jen have a sweet 17th ur sweet 16 years are so wicked awesome i just wish time never stop..when i'm with u especially with mike too and glad u two can get along  yaya joy yo the world love ya all...